Inner Viking
by RedHatMeg
Summary: After Tino's explosion of wrath, Berwald decide to go on a walk.


**Author's Note:**

**In some points this fic is damn crappy. But I wanted to write something with Sweden and Finland, besides - there was a lot crappy version with sadistic Denmark, torturing Finland, so it could be worse (well, it was nice idea for some epic SuFin friendship moment, but in the end doesn't suited to the rest).**

**In first I wanted to make it just a story of argue between Sweden and Finland, but then came this "Inner Viking" idea. Well, I was listening "Animal I Have Become" on and on, and thought about something with brutal Berwald and that was the place for Denmark torturing Tino, but - as I said earlier - this idea just wouldn't suit to the whole composition.**

**But still I think it isn't that bad, so pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase, comment.**

* * *

**Inner Viking**

Tino and Berwald never had real argue before. Even if Finland really wanted to dispute with Sweden, it was rather impossible. First Tino was too afraid of Berwald to make a rumpus and even if he manage to do it, Berwald generally was saying something short, like: 'I'll try' or 'I'm sorry'. And third – Tino didn't like conflicts and trying to avoid them as much as he could. So argues was rather rare things in their little house and everybody was thinking, two Nordic countries are only housemates in the world, who live in perfect harmony. During all this centuries Tino also thought it's true. Argues – the real, dynamic, furious argues – just wasn't normal in their everyday relations.

But this time was different. Well it's started innocently. Tino came into house with some shopping. Berwald quickly rushed to help him and both men brought bags with today's dinner to kitchen. They left shopping on the table. Exhausted Finland sat on the chair and said:

"Su-san, could you, please, make some coffee?"

"OK." He mumbled as he always do.

He turned on the electric teapot and started preparing the cup of coffee, while water in the teapot was starting to boil. In the kitchen was ruling silence. Berwald was waiting for the water to be ready and Tino was observing him. Hanatamago came into the room, jumped on the Tino's lap and curled to feel comfortable. Silence made Finland really bored, so he decided to start the conversation:

"Today the mall was really crowded, Su-san. It was really hard to walk to the stands." He looked on the Sweden. Berwald was still staring on the teapot, and seemed not to hear what Tino was saying. However, Finland was used to it and continued to talk: "And when I've done with shopping, I was driving in my car and suddenly two buses came out and stopped in the middle of street. I was standing there for thirteen minutes, before the bus drivers fixed it. When I turned up the engine, I've realized, I'm out of fuel."

Tino giggled and looked once again on Berwald. His housemate was still watching the teapot. Finland didn't know why, but he was expecting smile on this gloomy face. Oh well, that's how Su-san was. After all this years, he didn't changed a bit. But this time Finland wanted him to be a little cheerful.

"So I had to drive on this few drops of fuel to the nearest gas station, but I didn't manage to do it, cause three meters later my car died in the middle of the street." Tino once again giggled, gazing on the Berwald. And Swede was once again emotionless. Tino chuckled and continued: "So I started to push it. I've saw the station only few meters away, but it was still really hard to push my heavy car all the way. Nobody helped me and when I finally done with it and filled the car with fuel, I've paid three times more then usual. This crisis starts to really annoy me. Or maybe those guys from gas station had cheat me. I really don't know."

The water was done. Still in silence Berwald put it into cup, mixed with little spoon and put the coffee before Tino. Finland caught it with both hands and drank a little. Warmth of cup made his hands stress-free. Oh, Su-san was making the best coffee, Tino ever drinking. But still the atmosphere was rather gloomy, because Sweden started to make coffee for himself. Finland didn't liked this silence. He was expecting some comforting words from Su-san, after this short report of his day. Why he was deceiving himself? Berwald always listened, but he never respond – at least not in more then one short sentence.

"And how was your day?" Tino asked. He thought it would be nice to ask.

Berwald looked on him and after few seconds of silence said:

"N't bad."

Finland felt wave of annoyance. Short as always. They really was like marriage. Like old, cold marriage, where wife is talking about her painful day, but her husband seems not to care and just nodding. But Sweden always was like that. He always wasn't responding for his whining. He always was so silent and cold. Finland didn't remembered times, when he was different. Tino felt how something inside him was breaking. Some barrier, that was standing still for all this years with Berwald. This barrier broke in few seconds, when Tino couldn't take Berwald's silence any more.

Hanatamago quickly read the atmosphere and jumped from Finland's lap to the floor. Tino clenched the cup so tightly, that he almost broke it. He rapidly and loudly put it on the table and stood up. Sweden turned his gaze and rose his eyebrows a bit. Finland hit the table and screamed:

"Why can't you, for once, say what the hell are you thinking?! Say something! I'm tired of being the only one, who's talking!"

And that's how it was. One minute Tino was back home and greeting Berwald, and next he was yelling at the Swede, who was – as always – the model of stoical stillness. Finland was like in trance of suddenly released wrath. He forgot about his usual kindness and he was using words, that normally didn't suit to him. It seemed, that he was yelling for all this times of being scared of Berwald and trying to avoid the conflict with him. Even if Sweden wanted to say something, he couldn't cut this river of pretences. He was just staring at his furious housemate.

"Sometimes I think, I'm talking to the wall! Do you even listen me?! Or you just pretending and ignoring all things I'm saying?!"

But Sweden's expression was still emotionless, as always. And this made Finland even angrier.

"You are robot! Cold machine without any emotions! Always scary, always stiff! Do any kind of expression is so hard for you?! Do you can laugh or cry?! Do your face can manage to smile?! I don't know, when you are happy or sad! You seems to be angry all the time! And many times I thought, that you're angry with me! And I thought you want to hurt me! Why you must be so damn clueless?! I really don't know how I could take this all for so long! I really don't know how I could live with man, who is so numb and so emotionless as you! Humans need to show their affection, but not you! Because you, Su-san, aren't human!"

Sweden didn't respond. Instead he came out from kitchen. Angry Finland went after him and stunned, when he saw Swede, putting on his coat. He didn't even looked on the small Finn, he was just buttoning his cover with gaze turned on buttons. Tino didn't seen his face. If he could, he would observe some signs of hesitation.

"Where are you going?!" Tino screamed with fury. Once again only silence answered to his question.

When Berwald done with buttons, he put on his hat. He opened the doors widely and turned his gaze on shocked Tino. His face was still emotionless, but smaller man could somehow read from his cold eyes, that he is mad at him. Then Berwald came outside and closed the door harshly.

Tino was alone. He was too shocked to move and go after Berwald. He hadn't enough willpower to run after his own friend. He just kneeled on the floor. When he closed his eyes, he could once again see Berwald's cold gaze. Now, after Su-san's exit, Finland slowly chilled out and realized everything, what he said to Sweden under influence of this uncontrollable wrath.

"My God…" Finland whispered to himself. "I've hurt Su-san."

Wave of guilt attacked Tino. This explosion was stupid and unnecessary. Su-san didn't do anything bad to him. He shouldn't let his emotions rid on poor Sweden. Now Berwald probably was walking outside alone and trying to calm down. Maybe right now he was fighting with himself. Maybe right now he was so angry, that he started to demolish something. Maybe… maybe he was crying.

Finland's heart ached, when he imagined tears behind Sweden's glasses. He never wanted to make Su-san cry. Tino felt determination, growing inside of him. He stood up, rushed to the door and started to searching for Berwald with only one goal – apologize.

* * *

_You are robot! Cold machine without any emotions!_

…Finland's voice in Sweden's head didn't stop to oppress him, when he was walking slowly through the covered by snow forest. Cold, harsh wind, that was pushing him and making the marching ahead harder, didn't helped Berwald to forget about Tino's hurting words.

_Do any kind of expression is so hard for you?! Do you can laugh or cry?!_

"Yes, T'no. I c'n." He mumbled to himself, while he was walking. Even, when he could cry, he tried so hard not to do it in the middle of the forest.

He wasn't that cold, as Tino thought. He just couldn't show it. Long time ago he was really emotional man. Back then he was laughing and singing very often. He was also in fury many times. He was a Viking then. Really energetic, livid Viking, who conquered many lands and was also hurt over and over again. But later he learned, that he should hide his emotions from rest of the world. It seemed to be good thing, because showing his feelings to others could be dangerous for him. If he would show someone, that he's scared something, that person could use his fear against Sweden. If he would tell someone, he liked him and this person didn't feel the same to him, he could be hurt. If somebody would see him crying, it would be consider as a weakness. So Berwald decided to hide his emotions and caged his inner Viking in his mind.

But his inner Viking wanted many times to be released. He was angry like a hell, that he couldn't control Berwald anymore. Berwald however knew, that if he set him free, Sweden would do something, that he could later regret. This Viking inside of him wanted to conquer something, fight with someone, loot, burn and… And he wanted to hurt Tino. Just because the Finn was smaller, weaker, Viking wanted to victimize him, to scare him, to hurt him. Because this disgustful bully loved to see someone's fear and hear desperate begging for live. But Sweden didn't want to hurt his best friend, his wife. Finland was with him all this years. Even if this friendship was a bit… odd – Tino was still Berwald's closest person.

But this time Sweden was hating Finland for breaking his heart. Now, after Tino's wrath explosion, his inner Viking was screaming for revenge. Berwald felt like never before, that he wanted to be far away from this horrible little blonde.

_Humans need to show their affection, but not you! Because you, Su-san, aren't human!_

How could he say such think? Of course he was human! And he many times showed his affection to Tino! In gestures. Who hugged him, when first night after their escape Finland was frozen?! Who defended him?! Who agreed for dog?! What else this little weakling want?!

Sweden hit the nearest log and soon felt warmth of his own blood, flowing from fresh wound in his right wrist. Then came pain, when coolness of wind met with open injury. Sweden stopped and sat on the snow, watching his bleeding hand. He was human. Machines don't bleed, when they get hurt. And Finland have seen him bleeding many times. So why? Why he doubted in Sweden's humanity?

Berwald couldn't take this any more. He started to cry. Oh it was such weird feeling – crying after so many years. Warmth of tears on his cheeks, sound of sniffing and this wonderful sensation of relief inside of him. He was crying quietly, but from the bottom of his heart. He suddenly remembered all the times, when he felt helpless, lonely or miserable. He remembered when he wanted to cry, but was too afraid to show it. Let them fall, Berwald. Let them fall…

"Su-san!" Sudden call of hated right now Finland made Sweden stop. "Su-san, where are you?!" That midget! Go away, go away! "Su-san, I'm sorry! Please, come back and let's talk!" I thought, you think, that you're talking to the wall! "Please, Su-san!" No 'Su-san' me! Get out! I don't want to see your face!

And suddenly there was loud 'crack' sound. Then Sweden heard Finland's frightful scream "Aaaaaa". He immediately forgot, he was mad at Finland, and stood up. He started to rush in direction from he heard Tino's calling. Soon he reached the place, where he saw small footprints that came from opposite direction, then Berwald, and big, but not so deep hole. Inside Tino was lying on his belly. If he was a bit taller he could easily get out from there, but his head was half meter from hole's edge.

Finland put his gaze up. When he saw Sweden, he smiled, but then he thought, that Su-san must be still mad at him, so he probably won't help him get out from the hole. Berwald was staring at him, when Tino stood up and decided to climb on the hole's wall.

"Stay there, Su-san." He called from there and smiled. "I will get out from there and we come back home."

Sweden didn't say anything. He just waited. Soon Finland found out that walls of his trap was flat and smooth. Tino grimed, when he tried to find any kind of cavity. After minute of hopeless searching, he started to be in state near panic. Berwald sighed, kneeled before the hole and reached both arms to Tino, who once again smiled with relief. Finn caught hand of Swede, who pulled him out from hole and sat on the edge like a little child.

Tino looked on Berwald's wounded wrist and his eyes widened.

"'t's j'st a scr'tch." Sweden calmed him down and smiled a bit.

Tino put his gaze on friend and suddenly hugged him. Berwald could feel the tear drops on his coat. Sweden hugged him tighter and Finland felt another wave of guilt. Su-san was always such good friend. He wasn't angry at Tino, even a bit after all of this.

"I'm sorry, Su-san." Finland whispered. "I'm sorry that I screamed on you. I… I don't know what happened to me."

"'t's, OK. J'st m'rri'ge 'rgue." Sweden said. Tino could swear, Berwald smiled, saying that sentence. Then he stopped hugging Tino and stood up. "Let's go home."

* * *

Finland ended fixing Sweden's hand. They both were now in their house, save and happy. They were sitting on the couch and watching the flames in fireplace, that warmed them from the outside, when feeling of closeness done it from the inside. However there was still something that bothered Berwald. When all negative emotions to Tino faded away from his head, he realized something, that he didn't saw before. He looked on Tino and said:

"'m s'rry."

"For what? You don't have to…"

"Y's, I do." Berwald cut the Tino's sentence and continued: "Y' h'd b'd d'y 'nd t'ld m' 'bout it to r'c'ive w'rds 'f c'mf'rt, b't I d'dn't s'y an'thin'. Y' h'd r'ght t' y'll 't me."

"But I was really cruel to you, Su-san. It wasn't… it wasn't fair saying all this bad things about you. You are, who you are, and you express feelings in different ways, then me." Then he smiled. "I guess, not only in love, but also in friendship opposites attract each other."

Sweden smiled to Finland.

"Y'h, w'fe." Berwald said and wrapped his arm around Tino.


End file.
